Lauren’s five month old son still sleeps through the night so it was actually me who had to call our drink come midnight on a Monday. She may be a mother but I’m 40 goddammit. Anyway, up to that point we had a lovely time.

I first met Lauren when we were both newish to Toronto and acclimatizing to the city at a time when it was developing an exciting little pocket. Coming from Halifax, I had left the nest of a healthy ‘scene' for lack of a better word. My community was made of musicians and artists and zine makers, directors, designers and the like. Strangely, I always hesitated to move to Toronto because I feared it didn't have that in place. But in the early 2000s all that changed. It was a thriving time of firsts and both Lauren and I were there to share in the excitement.

But as life goes we never really got to know each other. We’d chat at shows, parties, on the street and in her store but it takes a proper sit down to get deep into issues of childhood bullying, romantic near misses and post pregnancy underwear (hypothetically).

On this night, at a bar I really should go to more, Lauren never checked the time or worried about the situation at home. And her new baby far from dominated the conversation which as any non parent has to admit, is refreshing. Don’t get me wrong, I love babies and I’m happy for everyone who has them but it’s hard sometimes to have a two way conversation. The cat owning comparisons only go so far. Yup, motherhood suits this one and as I learned, her pregnancy was one of the clearest phases of her life. Her clarity from where I sat has continued into motherhood and that is interesting to me.